Grilled Cheesus

This post is dedicated to Anne Betts. A few weeks ago Anne emailed me to let me know that the latest episode of Glee was about "God/spirituality" and that " it was one of the best episodes ever but apparently a lot of people hated it." One side plot of this episode involves Finn, a football player in the glee club that is dating fellow glee club member Rachel. When the episode begins, Finn is at his house making a ghetto fab dinner (grilled cheese on a George Foreman). Finn takes the sandwich off the grill, slices it diagonally, and notices that one half of the sandwich bares the image of the Son of God. Finn decides to preserve the "grilled cheesus" in a ziploc bag and eats the other half of the sandwich. Finn decides to test out the power of his grilled cheesus and throws up prayer requests to God on three separate occasions. All three requests come true. The funny thing is, the ways Finn chooses to pray is EXACTLY how we often times pray to God. See below, and ask yourself which bargaining strategy you have used before.

Strategy #1: You scratch my back, I'll scratch yours

Finn says: Super delicious, let us win our football game, for Arty. If you let us win, I will make sure we honor you this week in Glee club.

We say: Lord, if you get me a promotion, I will pay 10% to the church! Lord, if you give me a raise/spouse/relief from current trial , I will promise to read the Bible daily WINK WINK. Lord, if you get me a better job and more vacation time, I will promise to commit to a mission trip!

Strategy #2: You owe me

Finn says: Considering that I've dedicated a week of my life to you, please allow me to touch Rachel's boobs.

We say: Lord, you know I am in a small group, I go to church every week, and I'm abstaining from drunkenness among other things... hook me up brah! I've worked hard, put in my time, and I have earned/deserve X.

Strategy #3: I can evangelize better if You give me X

Finn says: I need a favor. Make me the starting quarterback . Think about it, I can deliver your message more powerfully if I am the most popular guy in school.

We say: If I had a smart phone, I could communicate with people more easily and work on witnessing /relationships. If I had a new car with comfortable seating more people would ride with me and I could casually pop in some Hillsong or Andy Stanley.

A few months ago, John McGowen highlighted that these prayer strategies will never work because they falsely assume the following:


So instead of trying to negotiate with God, perhaps a better strategy is to say "God have mercy on me", and do so with humility and genuine faith trusting in who God is. Look at how it worked for a blind guy in Jericho...

Then they came to Jericho. As Jesus and his disciples, together with a large crowd, were leaving the city, a blind man, Bartimaeus, was sitting by the roadside begging. When he heard that it was Jesus of Nazareth, he began to shout, "Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!"Many rebuked him and told him to be quiet, but he shouted all the more, "Son of David, have mercy on me!" Jesus stopped and said, "Call him." So they called to the blind man, "Cheer up! On your feet! He's calling you." Throwing his cloak aside, he jumped to his feet and came to Jesus. "What do you want me to do for you?" Jesus asked him. The blind man said, "Rabbi, I want to see." "Go," said Jesus, "your faith has healed you." Immediately he received his sight and followed Jesus along the road. Mark 10:46-50.

You see the difference? It's not about coming to God solely to get what we want, it's about having faith and trusting in who God is and what He is capable of (Hebrews 11:6).